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 One of the things I noticed in my exploration of human development and behavior was that all of us feel deeply hurt whenever we are treated unlovingly or when love is withheld from us. Why does it hurt so much? I began asking myself. Why don’t we tell people that we need them to be more loving? Why aren’t we always loving to others? These questions came alive for me. When I wasn’t busy with tasks that needed my immediate attention, I would find myself looking back at these questions and raising even more. What is love, really? What is loving behavior? How can we get it and give it consistently and unconditionally? Why is that so difficult? Why aren’t we more loving to ourselves? In time, I began to formulate answers and develop ideas. One of my earliest and most important theories was that love is an essential life-sustaining energy that nourishes us, just like air, food, and water. Thirty years later, this finding was finally scientifically validated. This explains why we need love. Without it, we wither. With it, we thrive. Although everyone is capable of giving love, most of us have a great deal of difficulty giving it consistently. The reason for this is that most of us were never taught how to give and get love consistently and unconditionally. These ideas are so infrequently discussed or studied that most of us have a hard time articulating what love is!We need to receive love consistently and unconditionally to experience true happiness, wholeness, and fulfilling relationships. When you’re starved for love, your ability to make good decisions for yourself and your relationship is compromised.Love as Nourishment Understanding the true nature of love is the first step to learning how to give and receive it freely and without condition. Love doesn’t come wrapped in a cute little package we can buy for ourselves or hand over like a birthday gift. Have you ever asked yourself what love is? Perhaps not,
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